found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Randomize