If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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