The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
