I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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