I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Randomize