i may or may not be watching the land before time
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
