their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
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