Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Randomize