wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Randomize
