It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize