You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
