i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Two words: nipple clamps
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