I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
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