thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
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