i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
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