Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
