Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
