Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize