oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Randomize
