i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.
You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
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