it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Randomize
