i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
Randomize
