How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Randomize