why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
