So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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