I would go down on you faster than GM stock
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
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