she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Church boner. Awkwardddd
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
last night I used snow as a chaser
I smell like Dick and happiness
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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