Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
Randomize
