i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Randomize
