Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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