pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
