At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
Randomize