You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize