so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Randomize
