He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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