Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
