i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
You sat on a wall pretending to be a gargoyle before shouting "batman!" and jumping at me
I'm the drunk Des Moines deserves, but not the one it needs
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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