my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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