woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
Randomize
