Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Randomize
