no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
