I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
