Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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