he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize
