sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Randomize
