Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
