Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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