i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
where does the pee come out of this thing
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize