I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
he was CRYING into my vagina
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
You told the bartender at least five times that you were naming your son "Jagermeister" but you would use the bartender's name "Fernando" as his middle name. You were drunk.
Randomize