My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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