this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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